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zavodilaterrariumI'm currently in mild pain from my period, but earlier it made my lower back area acted up to an extent it never has before. Not fun, but not personally concerning yet. I'd like to clarify, my period does not seem to give me mood swings, just reasonable distress from being uncomfortable and in pain. So my ranting is not because of it, I can just be normally aggressive instead XD
As written on Discord (with spelling edits):
I'm not claiming to be innocent of this, but its definitely frustrating when I notice it.
I was skimming through my ADHD diagnosis report again, and man I forgot how awkward it can feel to be dissected, whether by yourself or someone else. Anyway, what I was actually looking for was my IQ/performance stuff because I was reminded of it by a post in![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
agonyaunt. When I was younger and more egotistic, I'd sometimes wondered about what my IQ would be, so knowing scratches an old itch lol. Ofc, I know the numbers can vary quite a bit moment to moment (and sometimes drop over time even if the individual becomes more capable), but it's fun to think about.
My comment under that post:
Turns out they did tell me my Full Scale IQ (FSIQ)! I was tested at the age of freshly-17 using the Wechsler Individual Achievement Test® — Third Edition (WIAT–III) and the Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale® — Fourth Edition (WAIS–IV) (links lead to offical product listings).
For WIAT–III, everything was average, except in mathematics (above average to superior).
For WIAS–IV, I got a range from average to very superior. My FSIQ was in the 96th percentile (about 92–98 when accounting for 95% confidence interval).
Even with a score like that, I'm struggling to do my work, and don't like taking on extra work unless I'm really interested lmao
I've been reminded the of biphobia in the queer (specifically lesbian) community recently. Not that I could ever truly forget, but to be honest, I don't usually see or engage in queer discourse (at least, not while it's the topic of the week), and the fiction I read tends to either get LGBTQ stuff right, or not approach anything too touchy or complex.
As a very queer person, it's one of those "guys, are we being fr right now" things. Frankly, I find it strange that some people support trans identities but not bi- and pansexuality — I'd have thought that it'd be more unbelievable that gender is not binary.
I have personally felt the ramifications of biphobia (though it was also because of social dysphoria). Specifically, there were a couple of years after realising I'm queer where I felt like I should downplay my attraction to men and focus on my attraction to women. One reason was that I didn't feel 'queer enough' in liking men even as an enby/genderfluid person, despite literally not caring if other people liked men. I knew there was this idea that men were the enemy in some way and it was hard to ignore, even though I had male friends whom I had no gender-based qualms with. The other reason for playing up my love for women was that I knew people would see me as a girl, and I was more comfortable with the idea of being seen as a lesbian than as a straight girl (you can still see the biphobia at play here).
Anyway, currently my general view on queer labels, community gatekeeping, etc. boils down to "the specifics kind of matter because the world hasn't changed enough to allow for true, unrestrained queerness, but ideally we'd have a LOT more flexibility than whatever's going on right now". I'm not particularly picky on what labels people use, or what subcommunities they want to be a part of, as long as they're being as genuine as they can — considering that's not something that can be easily determined, I try to avoid thinking about individuals' identities unless it's become a problem or directly involves me in some capacity.
Honestly I wonder if I should have split this into different posts, but I've spent too long rereading it and can't be bothered lol
As written on Discord (with spelling edits):
ppl r so annoying istg
as much as we shouldn’t assume a negative intention/context from a low/no context clip or moment, we should also not be making up backstories for strangers to explain or excuse their behaviour hello???
saying “maybe they meant x” or “maybe that’s how they were raised” is perfectly reasonable, but jumping straight to “they had a bad past, okay!” IS FUCKING INSANE BEHAVIOUR
STOP WRITING FANFICS OF STRANGERS TO JUSTIFY THEIR ACTIONS
just because you know what time period or country someone grew up in, doesn’t mean you can assume what their exact life was like
hell, if you're in a culturally diverse country, half the time you will fail to guess which culture they were raised in purely either bc they weren’t born there or bc they WERE and you assumed based on appearance
IT’S OKAY TO NOT HAVE A CONCRETE ANSWER
IT’S OKAY TO SAY “i don’t know the context/reason, the situation is nuanced so it’s up to the people affected/present to make their own judgements” INSTEAD OF PULLING SHIT OUT OF YOUR ASS
“i don’t know” IS THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT ADMISSION IN SCIENCE, BECAUSE IT LEAVES ROOM TO FUCKING FIND OUT
STOP TRYING TO ONE-UP AND CORRECT OTHER PEOPLE WITH A SCENARIO YOU MADE THE HELL UP
I'm not claiming to be innocent of this, but its definitely frustrating when I notice it.
I was skimming through my ADHD diagnosis report again, and man I forgot how awkward it can feel to be dissected, whether by yourself or someone else. Anyway, what I was actually looking for was my IQ/performance stuff because I was reminded of it by a post in
agonyaunt. When I was younger and more egotistic, I'd sometimes wondered about what my IQ would be, so knowing scratches an old itch lol. Ofc, I know the numbers can vary quite a bit moment to moment (and sometimes drop over time even if the individual becomes more capable), but it's fun to think about.My comment under that post:
Not only do 'smart' individuals not need to prove themselves to actually be smart since it's not an achievement-based metric and instead an internal factor, but academia is also not necessarily the right place to be able to even prove such a thing. There are so many topics to be knowledgable in, so many ways to be intelligent that you can't possibly identify all smart people through traditional schooling alone.
I did IQ-testing for my ADHD diagnosis too, and while I can't remember what the number was (if I was even told at all), I do remember most of the actual activities. Some of the testing realistically would not be obviously reflected in any of the classes I've taken. The main aspect that this would apply to is pattern recognition. Sure, it's very helpful, but you can often circumvent the need for it with thorough-enough explanations from others and a good memory, especially early on and depending on the subject. It helps me understand things more easily, but it still relies on me actually having remembered base knowledge in the first place, which sometimes just doesn't happen.
And that's besides the fact that it's unlikely that any given individual is accurately estimating what average IQ looks like in the first place. It's far easier to measure based on your view of your own intelligence — for an arrogant individual, people "dumber than [me]" become "objectively dumb", and I don't think I have to explain how damaging that is, both in the nature of the judgement itself and the method of judgement.
It's not like I don't empathise! I've always suffered with this, but I like to think I've gotten better about judging people for their supposed intelligence. Even still, I can't remember ever having explicit distain for those who simply chose not to do harder work, because I myself only chose harder tasks when I was bored or actually interested in it; I studied for the love of the game, and I didn't expect it to be everyone's jam.
Turns out they did tell me my Full Scale IQ (FSIQ)! I was tested at the age of freshly-17 using the Wechsler Individual Achievement Test® — Third Edition (WIAT–III) and the Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale® — Fourth Edition (WAIS–IV) (links lead to offical product listings).
For WIAT–III, everything was average, except in mathematics (above average to superior).
For WIAS–IV, I got a range from average to very superior. My FSIQ was in the 96th percentile (about 92–98 when accounting for 95% confidence interval).
- The lowest scores were for Working Memory, with it being the only WAIS–IV category in which I did not score better than average with an overall percentile rank of 55 (37–72 with confidence interval).
- The highest score was for a Processing Speed subtest, Symbol Search, with a percentile rank of 99.9, which is still wild to me. How did I manage that? How did I forget about it?! I wasn't even gonna give any actual numbers but this one was shocking enough that I changed my mind aha
Even with a score like that, I'm struggling to do my work, and don't like taking on extra work unless I'm really interested lmao
I've been reminded the of biphobia in the queer (specifically lesbian) community recently. Not that I could ever truly forget, but to be honest, I don't usually see or engage in queer discourse (at least, not while it's the topic of the week), and the fiction I read tends to either get LGBTQ stuff right, or not approach anything too touchy or complex.
As a very queer person, it's one of those "guys, are we being fr right now" things. Frankly, I find it strange that some people support trans identities but not bi- and pansexuality — I'd have thought that it'd be more unbelievable that gender is not binary.
I have personally felt the ramifications of biphobia (though it was also because of social dysphoria). Specifically, there were a couple of years after realising I'm queer where I felt like I should downplay my attraction to men and focus on my attraction to women. One reason was that I didn't feel 'queer enough' in liking men even as an enby/genderfluid person, despite literally not caring if other people liked men. I knew there was this idea that men were the enemy in some way and it was hard to ignore, even though I had male friends whom I had no gender-based qualms with. The other reason for playing up my love for women was that I knew people would see me as a girl, and I was more comfortable with the idea of being seen as a lesbian than as a straight girl (you can still see the biphobia at play here).
Anyway, currently my general view on queer labels, community gatekeeping, etc. boils down to "the specifics kind of matter because the world hasn't changed enough to allow for true, unrestrained queerness, but ideally we'd have a LOT more flexibility than whatever's going on right now". I'm not particularly picky on what labels people use, or what subcommunities they want to be a part of, as long as they're being as genuine as they can — considering that's not something that can be easily determined, I try to avoid thinking about individuals' identities unless it's become a problem or directly involves me in some capacity.
Honestly I wonder if I should have split this into different posts, but I've spent too long rereading it and can't be bothered lol